
A Bad Day for Sales
first published 1953 · free to read
length
2,258 words
a few pages a day
~8 min
finished in
2 days
full read
9 min
At Folio's default of ten pages a day, you finish A Bad Day for Sales in about 2 days — roughly 8 minutes of reading each morning.
The opening
the first pages of A Bad Day for Sales, free
The big bright doors of the office building parted with a pneumatic whoosh and Robie glided onto Times Square. The crowd that had been watching the fifty-foot-tall girl on the clothing billboard get dressed, or reading the latest news about the Hot Truce scrawl itself in yard-high script, hurried to look.
Robie was still a novelty. Robie was fun. For a little while yet, he could steal the show. But the attention did not make Robie proud. He had no more emotions than the pink plastic giantess, who dressed and undressed endlessly whether there was a crowd or the street was empty, and who never once blinked her blue mechanical eyes. But she merely drew business while Robie went out after it.
For Robie was the logical conclusion of the development of vending machines. All the earlier ones had stood in one place, on a floor or hanging on a wall, and blankly delivered merchandise in return for coins, whereas Robie searched for customers. He was the demonstration model of a line of sales robots to be manufactured by Shuler Vending Machines, provided the public invested enough in stocks to give the company capital to go into mass production.
The publicity Robie drew stimulated investments handsomely. It was amusing to see the TV and newspaper coverage of Robie selling, but not a fraction as much fun as being approached personally by him. Those who were usually bought anywhere from one to five hundred shares, if they had any money and foresight enough to see that sales robots would eventually be on every street and highway in the country.
* * * * *
Robie radared the crowd, found that it surrounded him solidly, and stopped. With a carefully built-in sense of timing, he waited for the tension and expectation to mount before he began talking.
"Say, Ma, he doesn't look like a robot at all," a child said. "He looks like a turtle."
Which was not completely inaccurate. The lower part of Robie's body was a metal hemisphere hemmed with sponge rubber and not quite touching the sidewalk. The upper was a metal box with black holes in it. The box could swivel and duck.
A chromium-bright hoopskirt with a turret on top.
"Reminds me too much of the Little Joe Paratanks," a legless veteran of the Persian War muttered, and rapidly rolled himself away on wheels rather like Robie's.
His departure made it easier for some of those who knew about Robie to open a path in the crowd. Robie headed straight for the gap. The crowd whooped.
Robie glided very slowly down the path, deftly jogging aside whenever he got too close to ankles in skylon or sockassins. The rubber buffer on his hoopskirt was merely an added safeguard.
The boy who had called Robie a turtle jumped in the middle of the path and stood his ground, grinning foxily.
Robie stopped two feet short of him. The turret ducked. The crowd got quiet.
"Hello, youngster," Robie said in a voice that was smooth as that of a TV star, and was, in fact, a recording of one.
The boy stopped smiling. "Hello," he whispered.
"How old are you?" Robie asked.
"Nine. No, eight."
"That's nice," Robie observed. A metal arm shot down from his neck, stopped just short of the boy.
The boy jerked back.
"For you," Robie said.
The boy gingerly took the red polly-lop from the neatly fashioned blunt metal claws, and began to unwrap it.
"Nothing to say?" asked Robie.
"Uh--thank you."
Keep going from exactly here — Folio remembers your place and serves the next portion tomorrow.
continue reading A Bad Day for SalesAbout this free edition
A Bad Day for Sales by Fritz Leiber (1910-1992) is free to read in full. Folio serves it in daily portions you can actually finish, tracks your streak and reading position across devices, and reads every page aloud with a built-in narrator. The text comes from Project Gutenberg.
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